Sanctification
I have just finished reading 'the heavenly man' - it was a sharp jab in the ribs regarding my feebleness of faith and prayer and my constant and ready resentfulness. These people in China who were imprisoned and sent to labour camps on trumped-up charges actually lived out what Jesus tells us. They loved their enemies and rejoiced in the spoiling of their goods. They put their lives and service at the disposal of others (who I would not consider worthy!!!) and by that powerful and irresistable means they not only testified to the power of the blood of Jesus but also won people to Christ.
This last week, while going to swimming lessons in Reading, for the children, I was reading most of the time (The Heavenly Man and then 'Gold Fears No fire' - just finished that one last night). I was very put out at the unpleasantness of the man in charge of the pool. He has been trouble before - he seems to dislike the fact that there are 'so many' children from one family and sees it as, in some way, 'unfair'! (I felt like asking him which of my children ought to be left ignorant of swimming skills so that they would have an opportunity to drown.....). Because of his deliberate filibustering we were not able to book swimming lessons the last time they ran. It is not as though my children misbehave when they are there.... Anyway, he needled me by stopping me and asking 'do you have a little girl in the first group (and described her swimsuit)' to which I said yes. Then he asked 'how old is she' - there would be no reason to ask this if it were not for the fact that she is small for her age and lessons are for 5 to 15-y-olds (not to mention that there are other children who are under 5 there anyway....). I assumed he was asking me so that he could rebuke me for booking her in under five (she was 5 in December) but he was not able to do that and he said no more but went back to straightening out his floats. The point is, my reaction to his impertinent question was not good. I don't know whether this counted as 'suffering for the Name' - I doubt it, but the point is that it really brought out the worst in me. I have RIGHTS - this is ENGLAND - people should not behave like that towards 'perfectly innocent and responsible' parents - there are plenty of irresponsible and unpleasant parents far more worthy of his disapprobation.... (thus reasons the one who has walked with Christ for so many years and yet seems to have gone such a very short distance.......). I shall try to do better but by now I know that 'trying' just isn't good enough!!!!! There is a great deal more about this 'dying to self' business than I have yet apprehended (although I thoguht I was doing so well in serving my children and the home-school community over many years!!!) but will pray for the needful!